S4 E14 Organized Chaos: Finding Your Calm in the Crazy

SPEAKER_00 0:12

Well, hello and welcome to the Comforting Voice Podcast. I'm your host Shasta Ray, and I am back in the recording studio, and I've even got a better microphone. I have been doing so many experiments with sound in different locations in my house and stuff, and uh I appreciate your patience through some of that, but I am back in the studio. I got it re-orged and cleaned up and set up a little bit better, I think, and here we are, and I am joined by Murray and Baxter the cockatiels. They are just glued to me, and I was not getting away from them, so they're with me. Um, Emmy the mini macaw is upstairs, probably very angry because she's not down here, and the giant dog is upstairs taking a nap. So here we are. Oh my gosh, today is actually two weeks since I had surgery. I had a major abdominal surgery, and everything's good. I'm healthy. I just needed to have that done, and everything's good, but I'm still taking it easy. I still have about four more weeks of serious healing to do on the internal end of things, and I have been enjoying just kind of having some downtime with the birds. Lon is still waiting for his deli prep treatment, and um, I think that they're in the process of getting his surgery scheduled. And uh, here again, I don't think we're gonna have to chop his arm off, but he's not real comfortable with that damaged rotator cuff. So please continue to send him good vibes, and we're gonna hear from him. I have picked a really great recording that he sent in a while back, and that is the premise for our whole episode tonight. So before we really jump into tonight's episode, I want to remind you check out the website comfortingvoice.com. All of the episodes can be heard there. If you don't have a favorite podcast app, I even have a whole bunch of podcast app links there, all the popular ones, see what works for you, and that's a really great way to listen not only to this podcast, but also explore other podcasts. When you hit a subscribe button, it doesn't cost you a dime. What it does is it sends you notifications to your listening device that your favorite podcasts that you're following have published a new episode. That way you're alerted and you know when to tune in. It's a fun thing. If you haven't tried it yet, there you go, check it out. Two of the most popular podcast apps out there, if you're an iPhone user, would be Apple Podcasts. And that app usually comes on your phone. You may already have it, you don't even have to hunt it down. Another really great app that is very popular is Spotify. So check those two out. And both of those apps allow for the listeners to leave positive feedback on their favorite podcasts. That is a great way to help your favorite podcast out. It tells all the algorithms out there that people are enjoying the show. And when other people look for similar content, it starts suggesting us to those people. So that's part of our join the fun challenge. If you're listening in on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or any app that allows you to leave a like or a positive comment, please do so. It really helps us build our listener base. The other part of our join the fun challenge is just tell people about the podcast. If you're in a conversation or maybe you see someone on social media looking for something to listen to that's easy listening, there you go. Comfortingvoice.com, tell the others. Now, speaking of the Join the Fun Challenge, we are right at two months since our episode called The Comfort 600, and that was when our listener base hit 600 cities. It's only been about eight weeks. We have already increased our listener base by five countries and another hundred cities. That's amazing. That's all of you guys telling people to join the fun. That's all it is. So keep it up. I am thrilled. And for all of you that are new here, welcome. And of course, for those of you that join the fun regularly, it's always great to hang out with you. I'm glad you're here. Now enough chit chat. Are you guys comfortable? Do you have your feet up? Are you ready to doze off? Why are you here? Are you just hanging out? Are you kind of looking for something to fall asleep to? Whatever the case, make sure you're comfortable. Make sure you've got everything you need within arm's reach, right at your fingertips. That way you don't have to fidget with it. You've got your listening device set at that perfect volume, you've got your beverage of choice right there, and you're ready to go. And as soon as you're all situated, let's all take a good stretch. Just reach your arms and legs into a really good stretch. Engage those muscles all the way through to your fingers and toes. Wiggle your fingers and toes really quick and then just let go of that stretch and let your muscles relax. It's an instant thing. After that, take your finger and touch right between your eyes on the bridge of your nose where your nose kind of starts to dip down a little bit. Just a light touch, and while you've got your finger there, take a nice deep breath of air, inhale to about the count of four, hold it to about the count of three, take another quick little inhale, hold it another count or two, and then exhale slowly to about the count of six or eight. And then you can move your finger. And those three actions are gonna really set you up not only to shrug off some stress, but it also primes your body to sleep. So if you're not already dozing off, you might be very soon. Okay, now that we've got all of the preliminary stuff out of the way, it's been a while since you guys have had a tea tag and a fortune cookie slip. So I drew these earlier. I'm gonna have to bring the cigar box back over here. But your tea tag. Let your heart guide you. That's wonderful. And your fortune cookie slip. You'll become richer soon. Now that's a good fortune cookie slip. I do want to bring you down to reality though. Keep in mind that even if you find a penny on the street, you're technically richer. So let's hope it's in the bigger context of the word rich, huh? Yeah, that'd be great. We could all use some extra money these days. Okay, your lucky numbers off the back of the fortune cookie slip for those of you who like to play the lottery or number games. 42, 44, 32, 11, 3, and 14. Maybe that will lead to you being richer soon. Okay. Good luck. And let's put this in the archive receptacle. Alright. As I mentioned, you guys have been busy out there. Oh my gosh, you've been busy. Lots of people have been joining the fun. Let's jump into our segment that we call Join the Fun and see what our next three listener base locations are. So this is my little salute to the listener base, and every Tuesday we take a look at three different countries from the listener base, and it's our way of getting to know each other around the globe without actually being able to hang out in person. It's really fun. So first on our list for join the fun tonight is the Alland Islands. The Allund Islands are an unusual little corner of the world. They're part of Finland, but Swedish is the official language. They have their own parliament, government, flag, postage stamps, and even their own internet domain, which is. And that's a lot of identity for a place with only about 30,000 residents. The Alland Islands are made up of thousands of islands and rocky islets, but only about 60 are inhabited. So imagine having thousands of little pieces of land scattered across the sea with most of them left to nature. It's an island lover's dream. The Allland Islands have been demilitarized since 1856. This means that military forces are not allowed to be stationed there. This unusual status has roots in European history, and today the islands are known for their peaceful identity and beautiful Baltic Sea surroundings. So if you're joining the Fun from the Auland Islands, you represent a proud Swedish-speaking community, a remarkable island world, and a place with a long-standing commitment to peace. Next on the list is Pakistan. Pakistan is home to some of the world's most remarkable ancient history. The ruins of, I hope I pronounced this right, Mohen Jodaro preserve a city from the Indus Valley civilization which flourished thousands of years ago. Its people built organized streets and sophisticated drainage systems at a time when many other places had far less developed urban infrastructure. That is some seriously impressive ancient city planning. Pakistan has a spectacular tradition of truck art. Trucks can be decorated with brilliant colors, intricate patterns, flowers, poetry, and all kinds of eye-catching designs. These rolling works of art turn highways into moving art galleries, and the decorations can reflect the personality and pride of the people who own and decorate them. Pakistan is also home to a centuries-old tradition of, I hope I say this right, kawali, a powerful style of devotional music built around expressive singing, rhythmic hand claps, and musical accompaniment. It can transform a gathering into an energetic, deeply moving experience with performers and audiences caught up in the music together. So if you're joining the fun from Pakistan, you represent extraordinary ancient ingenuity, colorful art that takes to the open road, and music with the power to move an entire room. Last on our list this week is China. China has more UNESCO World Heritage Sites than almost any other country, and its list includes the Great Wall, ancient Imperial Palaces, classical gardens, and breathtaking natural landscapes. The country currently has more than 60 sites on the list reflecting an astonishing range of history, architecture, and natural wonders. China is home to the giant panda, one of the world's most recognizable animals. Wild giant pandas live in mountain forests where bamboo is their main food. They're a wonderful reminder that an animal can become a global symbol of conservation and that protecting a species also means protecting the habitat that it depends on. China has a remarkable tea culture that stretches back thousands of years. Traditional tea making involves much more than pouring hot water over leaves. Different teas call for different processing methods, and the preparation and sharing of tea can be an art in itself. In 2022, UNESCO recognized China's traditional tea processing techniques and related social practices as part of humanity's intangible cultural heritage. So if you're joining the fund from China, you represent a remarkable legacy of world wonders, a beloved symbol of wildlife conservation, and a tea tradition that has brought people together for generations. That was fun. Oh my gosh. Alright, let's check in with Lawn for this week's Got A Minute.

SPEAKER_01 12:47

Hey it's Lawn. Got a Minute Creating Structure Among Chaos We as humans crave order and structure in chaos. We crave human connections and interactions, and we find that things where we seek those are not overly successful. For example, social media falls flat. It's like eating pictures of food, not very nutritious. Taming chaos consists of creating structure in the void and organizing mess into order. We use a kind of map to connect ideas. An example in writing, we make an outline to provide an easy to follow flow. Creating order among chaos helps make things easier to understand and follow. So exactly what is chaos? It's defined as disorder and confusion, and it's derived from the Greek word meaning chasm or void. Chaos can take various forms messiness, uncertainty, confusion, a lack of understanding. This might look like a poorly structured company that lacks clear roles, responsibilities, and processes. Chaos could show up as uncertainty from the shared heavy sighs, OMGs and anxieties of others, from a lack of planning leading to a common oh, that's just my luck. More often than luck, the result of actions or inactions. It may be that we don't understand how to get started with a new habit, like going to a gym, taking a new class on a subject where we have no prior knowledge. When life becomes too chaotic, things get overwhelming and it becomes difficult to effectively get things done. Things just don't work well. We need some sense of stability and calmness to function at our best. So learning how to create a pocket of order among chaos is a skill that we can use forever to make sense of chaos. We encounter different forms of it in life. The two main forms are void and the mess. This is common among practitioners of mental health. They say the void shows up where there is a lack of structure. This may take the form of an empty calendar without a clearly defined schedule or plan. We are likely to drift through a day without direction and we won't get much done. Now that's great on vacation, not so useful when trying to achieve a goal. The solution to filling the void is to create structure. We can use structures to create clarity anytime we feel ourselves wasting time or just drifting along through life. If we feel lost, building structure to help fill the void can help. The mess The Mess is disorder. Picture a messy room or think of jumbled thoughts bouncing around in your head like so many balls. It's tough to make sense of things. The solution to the mess is to create order through arrangement and organization. This helps connect the dots, see things more clearly. Think about financial situations, for example. We have multiple pieces of information to think about, including income, monthly expenses, taxes, savings, debit, credit accounts, loans, and so much more. It really doesn't matter how many pieces there are, the point is finances will remain a mess until we take the time to organize them. Creating order a simple primer exercise to help is to put on headphones or earbuds, add some music of your choice. I like jazz because I was a student conductor in school, and it's layered and complicated. Anyway, close your eyes and match and tap out the drum track through the whole song. Your mind will build order and structure while pushing out chaos. Repeat by focusing on another instrument and hum, whistle, or even sing the part. Even create your own beat to further that effect. Creating order is a form of power. It helps you achieve more by creating certainty, clarity, and freedom. Chaos is uncertain, it's messy. We like to create order because we crave that certainty, clarity, and freedom. And whenever we create more certainty, our brain gets a little rush, a reward, if you will. It's like fulfilling a craving. By increasing our perception of certainty, we experience the emotional rewards of that satisfaction, calmness, confidence, safety, and stability. So step back and observe for a moment. Clarity provides direction and reduces feelings of being overwhelmed. Creating structure and building self discipline in life is a key to achieving real lasting freedom. And finally, learning to control chaos is an ongoing process. There are steps to help create order. Recognize ignorance is bliss, but if you want to create order, you have to first recognize there is disorder. Clarity. Take inventory of what you need to organize. What are the pieces? The goal isn't to create just any order. The goal is to put things in order that make sense to you. Thoughtfulness. Think through a structure or organization that will appropriately address your needs. Ask yourself how can I structure this in a way that will improve my certainty, clarity, and freedom. And finally the big one Act. Talk is great, but take action to put your new structure into place. Test it out, see if it works, make adjustments as needed, and continue to revise over time. A working example of everyday use of being in control, I had a past driving job that was running parts. A manager sent me to do a pickup in a town about fifty miles drive away. I returned exactly an hour and forty five minutes later. Attempting to put me off balance as I reentered the store, the manager asked, What took you so long? Without hesitation, I answered mainly the drive, the rest was stoplights, and I kept working. Create your own order. You can't completely remove chaos from your life. Rather, aim for order among chaos, for stability, and use that block breathing that we've all taught each other. Breathe in through nostrils to a count of four, hold for six, and exhale through pursed lips to eight. It helps reset the brain. Practice the skill of creating order out of daily chaos and thrive.

SPEAKER_00 20:30

Thanks, Lawn. That was awesome. And that is what inspired tonight's episode title Organized Chaos. We all have chaos in our lives, and the past couple weeks, oh my gosh, I've had lots of time to think about what I need to do, what I want to get back into, how I'm gonna organize it, and how I'm gonna do better. Because I tend to get off track, um, I get scattered, I get distracted, and look at this, we're two weeks into October, and this is technically our first Tuesday of the month check-in for the project you do you, because it ties in. So this is something I've been actually working on all year, and I've mentioned it before, just getting better organized, putting things away so I just don't have clutter, and I've been realizing the different ways clutter accumulates. Not only just physical clutter, but there's digital clutter, like how much time you're spending on unproductive social media interactions and stuff. I've reduced that down a lot, so I'm only focused on positive stuff as much as possible, and I reject the negative, so it's not even shown to me as much. That has helped my attitude. Oh my gosh, you would not believe what that will do for someone. But prior to my surgery, the house had, you know, accumulated tasks and I wasn't. Wasn't feeling well. So I just kind of forced myself to go through the motions a little bit every day, get some stuff done until the whole house was clean, everything was caught up, and I didn't have any tasks hanging over my head at all, so that once I got back home, I could just rest and relax, and there's nothing to worry about. That was probably the most amazing thing I've done for myself in a long time. Because while I do house chores and I try to keep things picked up, I haven't been doing the deep cleaning like I probably could have if I had more energy. So I got it all done, and wow, that was awesome. I am gonna make a hard effort to keep riding that wave. A few things I've learned on the way to help keep the chaos at a minimum, and then it keeps your head clear. It really does a number on your personal energy, your personal um thought processes, and even your mood. And you don't even have to get radical with this, but find a routine. Make sure that the things you do through the week, through the day, whatever it is, get in a routine of putting things away responsibly in the moment. Usually it takes less time to do it in the moment than it does to go back and clean house later, right? And I'm really guilty of trying to take on too many projects at once, and then I think I can organize those projects and just work on them in like a system. But then it just kind of blows up and I have a house full of clutter. So I am getting in a habit of when I want to work on a project, I pull that out, I get just what I need out for that project, and then I put it away. And instead of having clutter out, I keep a list to keep me on track with things I want to work on. So far it's helping. It's a hard habit for me to get into, I'm not gonna lie. But I'm finding that making a routine has been key for me to staying on track. And then that makes me happier as a result, just generally speaking, because I just don't feel like I have a bunch of nonsense to deal with. And sometimes you get clutter around you and you just don't even know why you feel weird. And then another thing I have engaged in the past couple years in particular is I ask myself, do I really need to buy that thing? Is this an impulse purchase? Do I need it? Do I have something similar at home already? Asking yourself a few questions before you make an impulse purchase is actually really, really good for reducing clutter. Sometimes we think we need stuff, it seems like a great idea, we get it, and it's just another variant of something we already ignore. So ask yourself questions and get yourself in a routine when it comes to your spending. You're going to find yourself with a lot more money in the bank also if you're if you're someone that kind of engages in random purchases that you just don't need. Same goes for groceries. Get a list, get organized, and stay on track. Hand in hand with that, I either throw away something that I've been saving that I'm just never going to use. It seems like, oh, I'll reuse that, but it's nothing you can donate, it's just taking up space and you realize I don't need to save it, it's just a piece of trash. Toss all that stuff, identify it and toss it. Now if it's something that's useful, it's in good condition, you're just never gonna use it again, get a donation box. When the donation box is full, next time you're driving by a donation station or a thrift store or something that takes donations, drop it off. Be courteous if you donate clothing or bedding, towels, that sort of thing. Launder it first. Make sure you're donating clean, usable items, and then be able to differentiate what is donatable and what really needs to be thrown out. If it's just garbage and it's really not donatable, just toss it. Nobody wants that donated. Another chaos decluttering thing I've been doing is it goes back into those bad habits or unproductive habits. I've been trying to identify time suckers and things that I engage in that's not a good use of my time. When I eliminate that stuff, I feel better. And I try to replace it with something that's more productive or more enjoyable or that benefits me in some better way. That can be different for everybody. But one of the best things that I came up with as an example, here again, is just poor social media hygiene, for lack of a better term. It's a huge time sucker. Give yourself some limitations. We all like to surf our favorite social media platforms, but just keep it in check. Identify when it's getting to be too obnoxious and when you're engaging in it to the point it's infringing on other areas of your life. And that's it. Just be conscious of it and you're gonna find better balance with it. It's not about a radical elimination of everything. It's about finding what works. While I was recouping, I have a tablet device and I downloaded some games on there that are very, very, very addictive. They just suck you in and you just go through the motions type of game, right? I started recognizing, well, while this is fun, I'm not getting anything out of it. It was having almost the same social media effect on me, and I wasn't, it wasn't even stuff that I was thinking that much. It's just time sucker games. So I'd enjoy it for a little while, and when I noticed I was just putting too much attention on those games, I uninstalled them and I found something else to do. And then last but not least, one thing I was just I've been laughing at myself for the past couple weeks on this, and that is my TV choices. So I decided to treat myself to a couple of streaming bundles off of Amazon Prime while I recoup from surgery, and I thought that'll give me stuff to watch, right? And between two streaming bundles, and they were very affordable, and I already shut them off so they won't renew at the 30-day mark. I just have use of them for 30 days, enjoyed it, but what I found I was doing is scrolling through endless movie titles, nothing seemed good. Sometimes I was starting to watch a movie, I didn't like it, I would just turn it to something else, and I found myself just going through endless, endless options, and then going back to my favorite movies that I've watched a handful of times anyway, or even streaming um past episodes of like doc you series and stuff like that. I found myself spending more time on the Tubi channel streaming old stuff than I was looking at the new stuff or new movies or anything that were on those streaming channels. So I kind of learned something about myself in that. Sometimes more choices just isn't better, and you're not gonna have a better use of your time. I probably would have had more fun reading a book, to be honest with you. So that was kind of an interesting thing that I noticed about the past couple weeks, is I ended up just watching a regular TV channel or stuff I've already watched before, things that were comfortable, things I already know I like, and all these new choices didn't benefit me all that much. Now, if you're a movie buff, maybe that's what you need to do. Maybe that's an option that works better than other things. You never know, we're all different. Find what works for you, find what gives you balance and peace in your life, and then find a way to regulate your time spent or how you focus your attention. And sometimes the whole idea of moving from chaotic to organized is just finding balance in your life with things you're already doing. Everyone is so different, so yeah, that's what I did the past uh month as far as my ongoing self-improvement, New Year's resolutions that are not New Year's resolutions efforts, and I gotta say, it really does help life get better. You reduce stress when you reduce chaotic factors. And when you can have peace and predictability, you're gonna find you're just generally happier. Things flow better. See what works for you. What kind of ideas did this spark to reduce a little chaos in your life, reduce those surprises you don't want, or those vibes you don't want, or that feeling of I got too much to do that you don't want. See what works for you, eliminate some chaos, and bring in some organization. Do it slowly so it's not painful. Baby steps, people, baby steps are the way to go with this. That's all there is to it. Alright, I'm gonna get this edited and in your eardrums, and uh we'll be back on Friday with our Friday night vintage bedtime story. We are reading The Hardy Boys, and the story is taking some interesting turns. You don't want to miss it. I'll catch you then. Sleep tight, good night, and bye bye.